How To Lose A Scarf (or all of it)

My advice to you today is:

Cut out the crap that holds you back.

I was in Montreal a few weeks ago and I lost one of the most important things I owned. It wasn’t much in terms of money but to replace it emotionally is nearly impossible.

It was a scarf. More precisely a pashmina that I folded over and over into a scarf which faded from light pink to mauve. It was given to me by an ex-girlfriend as a reminder of her when I got kicked out of Canada. I wore it nearly everyday (minus the scorchers in NYC) and it became a sort of signature for me amongst my friends.

Carl and his mauve scarf.

While I was in Montreal someone (mistakenly I hope) took it.

I scoured the dance studio, the bar I had been at, the restaurant I had been at before that, and I couldn’t find it. I became incredibly upset. I would use the word fuming.

In honest opinion I felt naked without it. It had become as much a part of me as my tattoo.

I have recently written on overcoming adversity and sometimes it’s hard to follow your own advice on these things. The easiest thing to follow was to allow myself to actually feel that disconnect from a part of me. It hurt and made me angry.

The next day, a friend handed me a different scarf, orange and sans emotional attachment, and I felt warm again.  It is still winter in Montreal till May sometimes.

In addition to the comfort of having a scarf wrapped around my neck, the loss of this emotionally laden object finally cut me free from a year of guilt. I had held on to the scarf as I had held on to the relationship.  With the scarf gone the residual pain and resentment I held over myself dissipated.

So my advice to you again:

Let go of the objects which hold you back from fully living today. Whether it was a mauve scarf like mine or something else, let it go, feel the pain and become free.

Share and Enjoy:
  • Digg
  • del.icio.us
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Reddit
  • StumbleUpon
blog comments powered by Disqus